Word Up!

I have a strange personality. I can make great conversation with a random stranger, but I also enjoy periods of isolation from my closest family and friends. You'd think these two scenarios would be reversed. Not in my crazy world!

As I mentioned in the first sentence, my personality is strange. I have a slight idea on how I arrived at this lonely place. It's not my proudest accomplishment, but it is the truth. And I have to deal with it. Every.Single.Day.

Someone once told me I was "stuck-up" (don't worry, she was mad at the time). I laughed and nearly lost my breath from gasping so hard. It obviously was a person who didn't know me well. Those who get me know that the only thing "stuck-up" about me is the back of my shirt when it is magically tucked inside my pants (so much for revamping in the ladies room). I can be a bit clumsy at times. Just ask my elbow.

Anyway, I make light of her revelation because it was only a word.

In my reality I am:

• Funny - I like laughing until my stomach hurts. It's the only way I get any exercise.
• Compassionate - I'll cry right along with you when you're in pain. Besides, I can't let you be the only one with raccoon eyes after your make-up runs.
• Creative - The ideas I come up with surprise me sometimes. I don't think Martha Stewart has anything to worry about though.
• Bold - I'll wear some of the most craziest outfits. At least I'll be on someones list, even if it's worst dressed.
• Sensitive - Everything has feelings to me. I apologize to the squirrel I ran over the other day. My bad!
• Forgiving - Hurt hurts and so does hatred. God don't like ugly. I'm getting into heaven. Holla.
• Trust-worthy - If you tell me to hold on to something, I'll do it. Just don't asks me to watch your bag of Almond M&M's. The pressure is too much to handle.

 Lately I have been:

• Bitchy - Everything irritates me, even breathing. I'd like to blame P.M.S., but I can hardly find her on a regular basis.
• Distant - I don't want to see, talk, or hear what goes on outside these walls. If you're not on Twitter, Facebook, or in the blogosphere, chances are I don't know what's going on in your world.
• Lazy - Housework has been resting patiently on a "To-Do" list. The dishes are now on the same washing cycle as me - as needed.
• Sensitive - This remains constant no matter where I'm at in life. I cried while watching someone else at a therapy session because I wanted to be on the couch with them. 
• Lost - I don't even know what my next step is. Not even a GPS could point me in the right direction.

Who ever wrote, "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me" obviously did not own a dictionary. There are some tough words in there...and they do hurt. They invoke emotions and leave us second-guessing who were are.

I could drive myself crazy pointing out all the small details. Opinions. Judgments. Suggestions. Advice. All comprised of words. As John Legend would say, "..everybody knows that nobody really knows." I bet you didn't even know I use to be a blond (peep the picture).

Call me what you want, but I'm not listening. I'm too busy discovering new things about myself and documenting this journey.

Word!


 
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